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"Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar" - Freud

Q: Why Don't They Give blondes Coffee-Breaks? A: It's Such a Pain In The Ass Having To Retrain Them All The Time.

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A pastor went visiting one afternoon. He knocked on one door several times, but no one answered. He could see though the window that the television was on, so he took one of his cards, wrote "Revelations 3:20" on it and stuck it in the door. (Revelations 3:20 says, "Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone will open, I will come in.) The following Sunday, a woman handed him a card with her name and the following message: "Genesis 3:10". ("I heard thy voice and I was naked, so I hid myself.")

Don't sweat the petty things, and don't pet the sweaty things.

Q: Why do blondes wash their hair in the kitchen sink? A: Because that's where you wash vegetables.